For a father of five grown children, trying to fathom the homosexual psyche is as difficult as a traditional lyricist penning the counterpoints of rap. Why, I ask, do two gay guys — let alone two gals — want to enter the tinsel world of marriage? It would seem to me that by definition they are “different” and would prefer not to follow in the mainstream of bridal gowns, tuxedos, flowers, and the prohibitive cost of big weddings unless they are in the catering business and would net a profit in the transaction, provided there are enough wealthy friends that bring along expensive gifts.
Surely, they cannot rely on the good graces of the father of the bride to foot the bill, particularly since one or the other parent would question just which one is the bride and certainly deny that his son is the one in touch with the feminine side. Stereotyping doesn’t help one in the decision since both are supposed to act like ladies, and the only way a decision can be reached, I suppose, is in determining which one shaves his legs. On the other hand, the loving couple could be two hairy palookas who vie with each other on who is the more manly.
Again, then, why would a couple want to complicate their lives by main-streaming into an institution that is not all that great to begin with. I trust that they have been shacking up for quite a while, so there’s nothing to consummate — and why cheapen the relationship by the prospect of an inevitable divorce down the road, or for the sake of a few bucks in tax benefits or social security in the unlikely event one becomes the housewife. As for the cornball of hospital visiting rights, good heavens, they’ve been living a lie for so long they can’t lie their way into visiting hours? As for being denied beneficiary of a loved one’s policy, it is pure bogus in face of all the proverbial idiosyncratic old ladies that will their fortune to cats.
I used to think that coming out of the closet was a courageous act of non-conformity. But now it appears the act is driven commercially to get in on the same financial rewards that the mainstream crassly receives. To me, the courageous act would be for a devoted couple to defy society by agreeing solemnly but without fanfare to exchange vows under the stars.
Copyright © 2004 Richard R. Kennedy All rights reserved. Revised: July, 2, 2004.