Andy’s shaggy brows on High Definition are clearly white birch splinters.… The only way to keep a clean keyboard is to avoid profanity…. Osama bin Laden is not my idea of a militant leader; from the hundreds of images on TV he looks more like a mountain goat with a cane, and why is it he only walks down those rocky hills, has anyone ever seen him climb up?…A liberal goes to see the “Passion” to feel the pain of the underdog.…The conservative sees it for the heroics in enduring pain.…If single mothers are paid to take care of their children, shouldn’t housewives be paid too?…Did you know that the Girl Scouts are now entrepreneurs at $6 for a box of cookies?…Memories are short, what with all the talk about the political strategist Karl Rove, forgetting Dick Morris’ conniving for Clinton.…If Kerry wins, will John McCain be the secretary of defense or will he be outranked by Wesley Clark?…Guilt by association: Rush Limbaugh’s cousin, a Missouri supreme court judge, was the favored as the administration’s choice to fill a vacancy on the 8th US Court of Appeals; he didn’t get it thanks to his relative’s bad habit.…Can a straight person be a one-issue voter on gay marriage for or against? — it seems masochistic.…Almost as bad as a gun-issue voter who shot his pal while hunting, still favors guns.…How is it in a nation that prides itself in the free exchange of ideas can somehow become monolithic by marrying into ideologies?…The social climate would be balmy if gays just stayed in the closet, but upon reflection, why must there be a closet at all?…Similarly, if a woman is carrying a fetus she doesn’t want, she should keep it private and just go ahead and terminate it, but upon reflection if she tells all, she must really want it.…I wonder what the world would be like today had the Israelis decided to set up a democracy on another continent….I trust Mel Gibson has his film crew on alert when the Shiites get hold of Saddam and beat the hell out of him with their self-inflicting chains.…I just love all the commercials about the extraordinary efficiency of communications companies facilitating the nation’s business, but what they don’t tell us is that all of it is outsourced.…The UFT [NY City teachers union] is advocating faster removal of incompetent teachers, but they don’t have a strategy to keep competent teachers from removing themselves in their mad exodus to the suburbs.…What’s all the fuss over missing WMDs when everyone knows the administration was referring to Saddam as the number one weapon of mass destruction? — they just forgot to mention it before the invasion.
Copyright © 2004 Richard R. Kennedy All rights reserved. Revised: March 20, 2004.